R'lyeh
Male
It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum
I like where this is all heading.
Boulder, CO
Female
[space for rent]
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum
Pics or it didn't happen.
LaCrosse, WI
Male
Strategic Beer Command where the metal hits the meat.
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum
Lets just not call it a date though, ok? I don't want people to get the wrong idea.
CO
Male
"...We're taking photos" ... "PHOTAHOES?!?!?! ?!"
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum
Five days before the apocalypse, great explorations were made by Therrin and I.
...We're one step closer to finding the true purpose behind the Barn of Doom.

Sadly, I fear we're too late. The post-apocalyptic clouds of doom have already blanketed the skies above the barn...

We may be able to spill the story here before the top secret government agents catch up with us, but this is all I have time for....I bet they're triangulating in on my position now.

Boulder, CO
Female
Why YES! Yes I CAN make anything into a sexual innuendo.
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum
Such a dope picture. Sad that I missed out on the adventures with awesome dudes!
berthoud,Colorado
Male
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum
Cavemonkey ponders why it is not on fire yet.....
LaCrosse, WI
Male
Strategic Beer Command where the metal hits the meat.
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum
Its not the 32nd yet.
This member has been banned. See the banlist for more information.
North of Chicago, IL
Male
*Therrin puts on the penguin-suit
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum
NO TIME!

Someone's been following me for the last several hours. As soon as I lose them I'm going to put up my photos and relate to you all what I found inside the Barn.

Someone is obviously desperate to keep this information from leaking out.

Some of the things in that place I probably shouldn't even talk about...

Have to go for now.
LaCrosse, WI
Male
Strategic Beer Command where the metal hits the meat.
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum
I hope the JIB. doesn't get him first.
MSP
Male
Secret Cult Member
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum
Posted by junkyard
I hope the JIB. doesn't get him first.


JIB...

Juggalos in Black?

Jerks in Barns?

Junkyard's Irritable Bowel?
Boulder, CO
Female
Why YES! Yes I CAN make anything into a sexual innuendo.
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum
Posted by NotBatman


JIB...

Juggalos in Black?

Jerks in Barns?

Junkyard's Irritable Bowel?


Hilarious.
This member has been banned. See the banlist for more information.
North of Chicago, IL
Male
*Therrin puts on the penguin-suit
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum
Even finding this location took several days, and it was only after I realized that it cannot be simply viewed by mere mortals, that I had to go and make myself immortal. This is easily accomplished by drinking the blood of a zephyr. Zephyr blood was available at the local walmart, I was in luck.

After drinking the zephyr blood and heading back to where this location was supposed to be, I saw this. (which you can see because the pictures were developed using zephyr blood also)



Now that I could see the location, my lifelong friend InsertNameHere and I made our approach. The portal of regular human entry to this location had been painstakingly protected by a crapton of padlocks and screws drilled in from the backside to inhibit you from trying to PUSH your way through said padlocks. (as though someone would actually try that right?)



Against my better judgement, I was immortalized photographically next to this portal of the gods.



I set all of my psychic powers to bear on this portal, and nothing happened. So my amazingly talented exploring companion and I linked arms and channeled the flow of our combined psychic energy at this portal. On the exact second that the clock struck the proper time, we flexed our minds, and suddenly...
WE WERE INSIDE!!!!



Finding ourselves presented with a creepy staircase, about 20" wide.



I trod forth to an unknown fate, and mounted those stairs like a ... like ... stairs.

And came upon the jail cell where FEMA holds the incoming prisoners of civilian action, and possibly aliens as well.



Immediately past this jail cell was a holding-room where I believe they were subjected to gas and/or chemical showers and/or really bad music, possibly by Yanni.


There appeared to be craftily built skylights in the ceiling, which looked amazingly natural. The government is sneaky though, so I'm sure these "skylights" were created by a special government contractor who they paid billions of dollars for some kind of "green" program inside of a "black" program.


After descending back down to the lower level, I found a room behind a door guarded by a ghoul. I only know it was a ghoul, because after InsertNameHere walked through that door, the apparition popped out and said to us "I am a ghoul, and I am going to eat your soul, nave". But then he sat and was staring at us. It was only after a moment that we realized he was trying to eat our souls, but having none, he had become confused.
We left him there, lost in his confusion, and ventured past into another chamber of secrets, where we found...

THE PLASTEEL CAP OVER THE TUNNEL WHICH LEADS TO THE FEMA CAMPS AND/OR HELL!!!!



The fear turned our muscles to jelly. There was a palpable tension in the air, and I even began to make a noise which sounds like "EAAAAUUUGGGHHHEEIIIIIEEEE!" (try phonics on that one)

Only with the strictest control over our psychic selves did we manage to painfully tear ourselves away from that chamber, and back past the confused ghoul.

We immediately decided to exit this location when we heard sirens approaching.

Apparently the military was on its way, but some silly NCO had called the local police department in order to notify them, and the cops were trying to get a piece of the action.

We quickly split up and melted into the surrounding landscape, where we parted ways.
I am glad to hear that he has made it out alive and has posted here. I recently was able to lose those tailing me last night by jumping off a train bridge onto the roof of a moving train, then jumping off the train into a river, and swimming over a waterfall.

If I disappear any time soon, you will all know why, and you can spread the TRUE story to the world.

This location is extremely dangerous. It should not be approached by anyone for any reason. Your lives are at risk, and your souls. If you have one.
[last edit 12/20/2012 2:53 AM by Therrin - edited 2 times]
Boulder, CO
Female
[space for rent]
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum
This thread might be the best Christmas present, ever.
Boulder, CO
Female
Why YES! Yes I CAN make anything into a sexual innuendo.
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum



I set all of my psychic powers to bear on this portal, and nothing happened. So my amazingly talented exploring companion and I linked arms and channeled the flow of our combined psychic energy at this portal. On the exact second that the clock struck the proper time, we flexed our minds, and suddenly...
WE WERE INSIDE!!!!


That's what she said.
This member has been banned. See the banlist for more information.
North of Chicago, IL
Male
*Therrin puts on the penguin-suit
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum
Posted by Snipe_Hunter

That's what she said.



why would she say that? She wouldn't say that...

would you say that? I don't remember you saying that.

[last edit 12/20/2012 4:58 AM by Therrin - edited 1 times]
Boulder, CO
Female
Why YES! Yes I CAN make anything into a sexual innuendo.
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum
Posted by Therrin



why would she say that? She wouldn't say that...

would you say that? I don't remember you saying that.




Oh. Are you sure she wouldn't say that? .... fuck.
This member has been banned. See the banlist for more information.
North of Chicago, IL
Male
*Therrin puts on the penguin-suit
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum
Posted by Snipe_Hunter


Oh. Are you sure she wouldn't say that? .... fuck.


I could see you saying "AND THEN THEY WERE BOTH IN!" =)
R'lyeh
Male
It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum
I'm still not convinced this is a barn.
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North of Chicago, IL
Male
*Therrin puts on the penguin-suit
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum
ITS A FUCKING BARN YOU CUNT-NUGGET. You cannot dispute this.
Denver
Male
Re: Top secret government barn of doom
Posted on Forum: UER Forum
ha, noobs, didn't even get to the underground part of the missile silo
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