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UER Forum > Private Boards Index > Firearms (handguns, rifles, shotguns) > 13 Things Your Burglar Won't Tell You (Viewed 800 times)
DevilC 


Location: Washington, District of Corruption
Gender: Male
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I serve as a blank screen on which people of vastly different political stripes project their views.

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13 Things Your Burglar Won't Tell You
< on 3/19/2010 11:37 PM >
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Posted on Forum: UER Forum
13 Things Your Burglar Won't Tell You

1. Of course I look familiar. I was here just last week cleaning your
carpets, painting your shutters, or delivering your new refrigerator.

2. Hey, thanks for letting me use the bathroom when I was working in your
yard last week. While I was in there, I unlatched the back window to make
my return a little easier.

3. Love those flowers. That tells me you have taste ... and taste means
there are nice things inside. Those yard toys your kids leave out always make me wonder what type of gaming system they have.

4. Yes, I really do look for newspapers piled up on the driveway. And I
might leave a pizza flyer in your front door to see how long it takes you to
remove it.

5. If it snows while you're out of town, get a neighbor to create car and
foot tracks into the house. Virgin drifts in the driveway are a dead
giveaway.

6. If decorative glass is part of your front entrance, don't let your
alarm company install the control pad where I can see if it's set. That makes it too easy.

7. A good security company alarms the window over the sink. And the
windows on the second floor, which often access the master bedroom-and your
jewelry. It's not a bad idea to put motion detectors up there too.

8. It's raining, you're fumbling with your umbrella, and you forget to
lock your door-understandable. But understand this: I don't take a day off
because of bad weather.

9. I always knock first. If you answer, I'll ask for directions somewhere
or offer to clean your gutters. (Don't take me up on it.)

10. Do you really think I won't look in your sock drawer? I always check
dresser drawers, the bedside table, and the medicine cabinet.

11. Helpful hint: I almost never go into kids' rooms.

12. You're right: I won't have enough time to break into that safe where
you keep your valuables. But if it's not bolted down, I'll take it with me.

13. A loud TV or radio can be a better deterrent than the best alarm system. If you're reluctant to leave your TV on while you're out of town, you can buy a 'faketv' gadget that works on a timer and simulates the flickering glow of a real television.




Science flies you to the Moon. Religion flies you into tall buildings.
UER Forum > Private Boards Index > Firearms (handguns, rifles, shotguns) > 13 Things Your Burglar Won't Tell You (Viewed 800 times)


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