The car.............it was always referred to as a "machine.". What is a Hup-Mobile. "Machine goes off highway." "Boy killed by machine." And the advent of the Machine was also something to SCREW with if you were young and having fun in a remote spot.
Remember the time Sheriff Scudder...( I kid you not...that was his name)...recall when he was out on the Chenango Road...and those idiots, those kids, those youths, .....they had been stopping Machines all night with lanterns...pretending to need assistance....stopping cars...and then LAUGHING in the faces of those they stopped. So clever...
And then they did it to Sheriff Scudder. He let them go after assessing that they were not drinking. It didn't stop him from publicizing it the next day.

Cars.........machines.........weird odd things to screw with.

During the period when this town was the HQ of the KKK for NY state,....the DELICIOUS BRAND COFFEE people would put an extra special item in their advertisements. She was utterly like Aunt Jemima...her name was MAXIE. And next to her doo-ragged gape mouthed image would appear her little maxims. MAXIE'S MAXIMS. "I like my mint julip wid fros on de glass....and when dares fried chicken you know I'll nevuh pass."

It was all "cute" babble...but her appearance in the ad meant: "meeting tonight."
And where would that meeting be.....everyone knew...across the Chenango River from my little still living brook. In that still horrid dark industrial area.
Now they call it the Martin Luther King promenade. In those days it was called Tyler Park. (The current Tyler Park Aint the same thing). The old Tyler park is where Fruity birds of the night met in a toilet to undulate in secret. And when the vice squad got wind of those explorations, they made sure........absolutely SURE to ruin these people in the next editions....every single detail MUST be published....which Shoe Factory they worked at....where they lived,...where they lived before.
It's fun to have a tunnel through time.....that is what I call it...but....every single one of you...all of you...with your hair...your piercings.........your babbling about some "internet"........you'd have been as singled out as these "queers" and one headline uses the word "VAMPIRE" flat out......

Baseball bat to ALL of you....baseball bat. Let's not forget that as we Praise the Workers of the factories we explore. Baseball bat in head.....You are BANNED.

Here is a SPIN on the Truth...as in Article not in front of me.......so I will rewrite it......but for my own amusement FULL of vividness.....but the THRUST ...the problem...is TRUE:

do not confuse THIS bit of fun for lack of truth in other postings. This is just a sort of Instant melding of our-time style ranting with some facts I recall.
For the very serious history person....the thrust is...that around 1924 is when it became COMPLAINABLE as to these items being around town.

WHAT THE FUCK: SERIOUSLY
COMMON COUNCIL has tonight finally decided to get rid of 2 of the fucking 26 public horse troughs left in this city. (true numbers for 1924 era). I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooo fucking sick of having to drive my machine around these ancient pieces of bullshit. And why should my tax money be spent on these.
The money could be better spent on clearing out the moral degenerates from Tyler Park. Also, may I BLOW ON to say that Calvin Coolidge will never make it to a term of his own if he just wants to keep on pretending that he is Mr. Harding who passed the office onto him in an untimely way. And further....his son should have worn socks as he played tennis with his brother on the White House tennis courts or he would never have gotten the infection on the chafed toe that killed him. On the other hand...if all the fags down at Tyler Park looked like the late young Mr. Coolidge I would have been down there more often. Yours Truly...Olde TIME BlowHard. Esq.


EDIT: a "hooogah hooogah" horn noise should be heard at the end of those remarks.

A woman pulls a CLUMP of hair outta the head of another woman. The first woman shows the scalp damage in court. There used to be a little bridge. They knew gurgling waters as they argued. The waters were put underground in a pipe. They would have seen the construction. Neighbors with grudges/long dead.

great writing. Keep it up.

One can only scream so loud into a pit.

I wish I could go back in time so I could learn how to use the telephone. In the mid 1920's one can see newspaper articles in Binghamton about how the "girls from Buffalo" are coming to town to give a seminar about the proper use of the telephone. First they will "perform" live telephone operating at the High School for the kids. Later, there will be an evening session for adults. Perhaps it would be best to hop up in the crowd and shriek, "it's the work of the debbil I tells ya...the debbil."

this is some crazy shit you've got goin on here.

keep it up.

Things my yard told me:
Once there was a little brook flowing through this land. At the end of that brook was the point where it flowed into the Chenango River. Across the Chenango in 1870 there was the Halbert Brother's store. And one August nite we find two young clerks, Merrick, and Burrows, asleep together as usual in the same bed.
They hear NOTHING as three burglars use hand drills to bore three holes in a back door so as to reach through and unlatch three latches.
They clear out three parcels of valuable silks, and keep rummaging for more...when the clerks are awakened. They put up a hell of a fight. Burrows used a piece of iron to attack the burglars,,,Merrick resorts to fisticuffs.
The eldest burglar clomps up the stairs and shoots young Merrick point blank in the back of the head to stop the commotion. Burrows keeps fighting.

The burglars make their retreat and attempt to swim across the Chenango River.
Only the eldest makes it. The younger accomplices are wounded. They drown.
Their bodies are photographed on the banks of the river, and those photographs establish the legal precedent for the use of photographs in COURT. The elder burglar is Mr. Edward Rulloff. A brilliant rogue, he had earlier in life been sentenced to hang for killing his wife and daughter, but he got off on a technicality..after much other drama...including a jailbreak which cost him a big toe.
Rulloff was caught in the general alarm given after the robbery, but he bullshitted the pickets on the bridge until a train came and he jumped to the other side at last minute and disappeared by the time they could cross. He later hid in an outhouse of the farmer Livingstone. Chauncey Livingstone heard a commotion but knew not what it was about, he sat on his back porch with a shot gun for HOURS thinking he was staving off people trying to steal his fruit.
Finally, it dawned on him that it LOOKED LIKE there was someone in his out house which had the door wide open. He ruminated longer and adjusted his eyes.
Finally, he walked over there, and he found RULOFF crouched in the outhouse.
He cornered him and set of the alarm that sent Ruloff to both Fame and the Gallows.
Skipping MUCH, let me just say..........RULOFF is buried on a hill above my house. The cemetery he rests in is one of four on the route of the Trout Brook/Creek which was buried in the mid 1920's and runs under my yard in a storm drain. His accomplices died near the outlet of Trout Creek, which was free flowing then, and he lived to climb up the bank near there, only to be buried near what is now the "infall". His head was cut off and his brain is on display to this very day at Cornell. His hanging in Binghamton brought in 6600 people on the trains, when this town had a population of 12,000.
No lesser light that Mark Twain, argued for the commutation of his death sentence, and it helped with a STAY, but, in the end he was hanged in Binghamton in 1871. For over 30 years there has been a popular restaurant...more: bar...just off the Cornell campus in Ithaca named RULOFFS, and their website still claims that Ruloff was the last person hanged in New York. I will bring them the notices of a Mister Meineke who was hanged six years later in Binghamton when I get up that way next.
This is all just rushed rambling ..a preview, if you will...as the work is painstaking. When they hung Ruloff they didn't give him a trap door....they pulled him UP. I am gonna do that too.
And for the last time........when you see some JACKASS say that I am "obsessed with a storm drain"...please...know thee well, that THIS is one amongst many stories this drain under my yard has yielded..and I remind you...Ruloff is buried at the top of the system, headless, and he swam to a nite of safety right at the bottom of the system after his crime. Telling YOU this stuff, HERE right NOW, is not of much WORTH to me.........except in THAT,...there are so many other things along the way....I am just a guy who bought a house, had a manhole in the yard that flooded, and found this all out...it is not my FAULT if others want to compete about bigger better storm drains. I see the pics...i lust after them too,,,,but I am doing THIS. Make that OK.

Keep up the amazing work.