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UER Forum > Journal Index > its only tresspassing its not murder > Oh so Alone. (Viewed 1572 times)
Oh so Alone.
entry by Bones 
9/28/2006 11:40 PM

Not to many times in my life have I ever felt so alone it was frightening. I'm not talking about that lame kind of alone where you know your going to die alone, and you have no sould mate or friends or any of that shit. I'm talking about actually being alone, no one around, in a place you've never been before. I've actually only really felt "alone" three times, and they were all exploring.
The first time was when some friends and myself were exploring the former Schmidt Brewery. We were climbing thing flag tower, when my fear of heights kicked in and I was frozen by fear, I couldnt make it up one more stair. They mad the choice of continueing climbing the flag tower so they could reach the grain belt and all that, and I made the choice of staying on the floor I was on to take pictures and just avoid a panic attack. At first I really enjoyed being alone there, just sitting in complete silence. Soon enough the silence faded away and the noises of the building started to come out. At first it was pidgeons flying around the floor below me and making the sound that a large group of birds make. Then to add to that I started to hear doors that blow open and slam shut with every gust of wind, and that noise echoes through out the building. I started to get the feeling that I wasnt 100% alone, like there was some bum walking around. All the noises started to get so intense that I started to freak out a little, and all that crappy stuff. Just as I was about to say "fuck it" to my fear of heights and quickly walk up the stairs to avoid being alone any longer, I heard one of my friends yell from the top of the stairs "BILLY BONES!" The noises went away, and I felt relieved.
The second took place in a cave, Oh Minnesotans and their god damn caves, sand in everything. But back to the point. Me and and the same friends were playing a nice game of hide and go seek, and I was seeking them out. Now when I first started I was fine, I found it really fun. Then I noticed I'd been walking around in circles, not being able to find them. Then I decided to go down somewhere new. And then I got that feeling, that feeling of being lost and allllll alone. My only light was that of my mini mag and even that light was starting to fade out, not too bad, but it started turning that orangeish color. I started to get scared. Being all alone and feeling lost in a cave. But well I found who I was looking for and that problem was solved.
The third time was just recently. Me and two peeps were chillin at Island Station. Now inside there, there are tons of stairs, alot of those stairs are ones that are rust that are part of a cat walk system that all goes up to the roof. Now this place was built in 1921 and has been neglected since then, so its in pretty bad shape. Now both people I was with decided to climb this to the ceiling. This building is one that large numbers of homeless people have been evicted from in the past, and is very easily to get into, and is known by everyone. So I began to think about the chance that we wernt the only people in there. What about that crazy tweaker who could be waiting there to kill us. And all that great stuff. Then I began to think about what would happen if they were to fall, then I would be responsible for calling an ambulance and all that shit, from a cell phone that would be in the pocket of a most likely dead 17 year old, who also doubles as my best friend. Now that would be hard to do. Going up to your best friend who has just fallen way over 100 feet, most likely hitting framework on the way down, then going up and pulling a most likely broken cell phone his pocket. I would probably just end up killing myself if that was to happen, but it didnt and they got down safe. But just thinking that, that could happen scared the hell out of me and gave me the sense of really being alone.



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UER Forum > Journal Index > its only tresspassing its not murder > Oh so Alone. (Viewed 1572 times)

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