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Infiltration Forums > Private Boards Index > OTHER: new and improved. > They're not so bad. Sure, they stick hoses attached to running car exhausts through your window if you disagree with them, but honestly, who doesn't?(Viewed 1138 times)

Greg

location:
Canada

They're not so bad. Sure, they stick hoses attached to running car exhausts through your window if you disagree with them, but honestly, who doesn't?
< on 8/16/2010 6:28 PM >

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Scientology is the major cult amongst the community today, and the archenemy of the internet AND A HIGHLY RESPECTABLE, LEGITIMATE RELIGION. It is based on the belief that money is evil, and that it is the duty of scientists to gather it all into one safely contained area to prevent all the suffering and pain in the universe. This is the main reason it is so popular with certain celebrities, who having grown up with no discerning talent are lost as to what to do with their masses of cash when it's thrown at them. IT IS A REAL RELIGION.

The organization helps people achieve the goal of shedding their money AND PUTTING IT GO GOOD USE, and subsequent negative karma, by leading them through a series of stages, or "levels" (often abbreviated lvl or OT). On achieving lvl20 (OT20), a Scientologist sheds his body thetans and gains Super Strength, Invulnerability, Invisibility, the ability to Fly, Yay! Immortality and heat rays that come out of his ass. There is an apparent lvl21 but no one has reached it because no one has found the Magestaff with +6 'give money to go on the big ship' skill. Scientologists always greet each other by farting in each others faces it is believed that this allows their minds to absorb the thetans in flatulence allowing their minds to develop telekinetic powers.

The name Scientology comes from Science and -ology, which means the science of. This means that it is the Science of Science, therefore anyone who doesn't follow its practises is at odds with reality, and will shortly cease to exist. Followers of Scientology are scientists, not to be confused with Scientologists, who are cheaper, Chinese produced rip-offs chock full of lead based paint.

How true is Scientology? 100 PERCENT TRUE. Well, for starters, with the ALLEGED abundance of "citation needed" on the actual wikipedia page of their founder, they can't get that right, let alone their religion. I sure hope they don't use their FICTIONAL We will fucking destroy you cause we are insecure policy on me for writing this. BRING IT!!! Also, skull fucking L Ron Hubbard is the quickest way to gain OT Levels, by rolling 1d4 every time you blow your load in his eye socket and it comes out his mouth.

dirt

location:
Oakland, CA

Re: They're not so bad. Sure, they stick hoses attached to running car exhausts through your window if you disagree with them, but honestly, who doesn't?
<Reply # 1 on 10/9/2010 3:21 AM >

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Scientology is no crazier than any other cult/religion in existence.

He seemed to move among very delicate objects, on ground mined with goodness knows what precious explosives. ~ Jean Cocteau

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