|
|
The Back to the Future series are a set of documentaries based on the real-life adventures of Marty McFly and Dr. Emmett Brown. Doc and Marty were renowned Temporal Terrorists, using time travel as a way to sabotage various key points within the history of mankind. Before Marty and Doc got their hands on the time machine (which was in fact a washing machine) and began changing history, the following events had occurred:
- The Germans won both wars. Twice.
- George W. Bush choked to death on a pretzel.
- The American settlers were beaten by the Native Americans, who later became the most advanced nation on the planet and enslaved the white man.
- There was no independent Belgium.
- Gwen Stacey lived causing Spider-Man to retire and start his devotion to Gwen's extremities.
- Crispin Glover never kissed a girl a subsequently Michael J. Fox was never born.
- Anakin Skywalker was left as a slave on Tatooine for the rest of his days, therefore never fulfilling any prophetic roles in any sort of galaxy far, far away...
- The USS Enterprise blew up on its first mission killing all the people inside.
- The Milkshake Brought all the 'girls' to the yard.
- MacGuyver Was a Jew.
- Tom Cruize never Became A Scientologist.
- Communisim Worked.
- Jesus Christ survived to this day.
- Micheal Jackson remained black.
- Chuck Norris was never invented
Doc's time machine, which was powered entirely by urea, was built from one of the very first Mighty Thor washing machines. It was invented by Alva J. Fisher until 1992, when Doc went back in time and stole the invention for himself. Doc went through a considerable amount of difficulty obtaining the urea required to power the machine (24.9 gallons per time leap), which led to problems for the duo when it came to getting back to their original time. When later in court, Marty and Doc blamed most of their terrorist actions on these difficulties. Doc and Marty were finally caught on their return from 1885, having committed a multitude of speeding train offenses. Doc was charged with stealing urea from the unsuspecting public and being generally insane. He was sentenced to 45 years. Marty was accused of kidnapping and losing a young woman named Jennifer Parker somewhere in the 21st century. He was also accused of attempting to overthrow the rock-and-roll music genre, but he was never charged for this crime, as he escaped shortly after his trial with said Jennifer Parker (whom he had hidden in a briefcase). He later dumped the time-traveling washing machine on a train line, destroying all evidence of his illegal deeds and derailing a high-speed train in the process. Jennifer left Marty further down the line for a kitten-dealer, and became heavily addicted to kitten huffing. Doc came up for his idea for a fart powered time machine one late night when he hit his head on his toilet after slipping on semen. Not a single person knows the name of the actor who plays Marty McFly except the CIA. Marty is wanted in 17 states for going back in time in order to murder his father (George McFly) and marry his mother (Lorraine McFly). This was not only classed as incest, but also caused a large variety of time paradoxes across the world, which took the FBTT (Federal Bureau of Time Travel) fourteen years to repair. During a particular trip, Marty impersonated Clint Eastwood, creator of all things. Clint later blew off Marty's hand. From Mexico. Marty was in South Carolina at the time. Doc was put to work in prison, but later broke out and started an underground business transporting kittens for kitten huffing. He is still at large. It is approximated that he huffs 11,702 kittens a year. The incredible amount of time the Doc has spent in said washing machine has led to reduced muscle movement in his face meaning, yes he does ALWAYS look like that. Biff Tannon died during the filming of the movie, however Marty went back in time to write a letter addressed to him warning him to use a condom.
| |
Easy to say now, with the benefit of hindsight.
http://www.longexposure.net | |
I'm randomly selecting threads for loxor.
This is one of them.
"The truth is knowable. But probably not, ever, incontrovertible."
--Don DeLillo
PICS |
Add a poll to this thread
This thread is one of your Favourites. Click to make normal.Click to make this thread a Favourite.
| This thread is in a public category, and can't be made private. |
Powered by AvBoard AvBoard version 1.5 alpha
Page Generated In: 46 ms
|
|
Ethics
