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UER Forum > Journal Index > Longbow's Journal > Insensitive jokes #5 & #6 (Viewed 1706 times)
Insensitive jokes #5 & #6
entry by longbaugh 
12/23/2005 8:25 PM

Two old ladies are sitting outside smoking cigarettes. All of a sudden, it starts to rain. One old lady reaches into her purse, pulls out a condom, cuts off the tip and puts it over her cigarette.
"What's that that?" the other old women asks.
"It's a condom," answers the first old woman. "You can buy them at any drug store, and it keeps your cigarette dry.
The next day, the old woman goes to the drug store and asks the clerk for a box of condoms. The clerk is a tad bit embarassed as the lady must be over 80 years old.
"What brand do you want?" asks the clerk.
"I don't care," the old woman says, "as long as it fits a camel."
The clerk just fainted.

#6
A young Marine officer was in a serious car accident, but the only visible permanent injury was to both of his ears, which were amputated. Since he wasn't physically impaired he remained in the Marines and eventually rose to the rank
of General. He was, however very sensitive about his appearance.

One day the General was interviewing three Marines for his personal aide. The first was an aviator, and it was a great interview. At the end of the interview the General asked
him, "Do you notice anything different about me?" The young officer answered, "Why yes, sir. I couldn't help but notice that you have no ears." The general got very angry at the
lack of tact and threw him out.

The second interview was with a female Lieutenant, and she was even better. The General asked her the same question, "Do you notice anything different about me?" She replied, "Well, sir, you have no ears." The General threw her out also.

The third interview was with a Marine Gunny. He was articulate, looked extremely sharp and seemed to know more than the two officers combined (surprise). The General wanted this guy, and went ahead with the same question, "Do
you notice anything different about me?" To his surprise the Gunny said, "Yes sir; you wear contact lenses."

The General was very impressed and thought, what an incredibly observant Gunny, and he didn't mention my ears. "And how do you know that I wear contacts?" the General asked. The sharp-witted Gunny replied, "Well, sir, it's
pretty hard to wear glasses with no fucking ears."


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UER Forum > Journal Index > Longbow's Journal > Insensitive jokes #5 & #6 (Viewed 1706 times)


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